Hearts, (L).

Well, every time i have an urge to write a post, i'll feel so guilty because this time could be used to do some schoolwork which i'm really lagging behind.
Oh whatever. I've been keeping up with the news lately, more of a habit now that i'm older, and i start to realize that i've changed, quite a bit.
Ever since i came back from my exchange semester, i find that i'm less of a social person and would honestly prefer being alone most of the time and i am really fine with it. Be it eating alone, studying alone, going for lectures, tutorials alone; i've done it all this semester.
Sometimes i would get a little lonely and i start to wonder why have i changed this way. I would think of the times when i was always surrounded with people, the times when i was almost constantly laughing. and you know what, i missed those.
I think that growing older, growing matured comes at a cost, and that is perhaps laughter in my case. I find that the more things i know, the less happy i become. I got skeptical over things, think twice about people who are trying to get close to me, doubt things that i see and feel that my peers are either mindlessly chasing things that everyone else is chasing, or unmotivated and driven and do not have the slight motivation to simply find out what they are living for.  In other words, I just look at them and go, "Oh no he/she has to grow up."
In the past, i would get so defensive whenever my seniors/peers accuse me of being a typical girl who doesnt know what she wants, and have to be around people all the time to make herself secure. you know, the traits of a typical small girl who needs protection all the time.
Well, i wouldn't deny that I am still unclear of what I want to pursue in my career path, but i'm definitely not the whiny small, helpless girl that i'm accused of. Not in the past, not in the present nor the future. But now, i can't be bothered with what others think of me and I find myself smiling as thoughts of "I can't be bothered what you think of me" flash past.
I used to always get so upset whenever i was accused of things that i did not do, or rather things that were not my intention to do, but feel so helpless and sad to even stand up for myself. I would then allow all the negative thoughts to swim inside my head day and night, making myself miserable. I do not even understand why do i allow myself to be treated this way!
Haha the new me would never allow myself to be bullied by others, swear to stand by my conscience and values and never to let the wavering tongues get into my head anymore.

No doubt I feel more matured, but I do find myself laughing less. Browsing through my Facebook and I found many videos that I was tagged in and I started watching them one by one. Oh my, how those memories come back again :') I really miss the innocent happy days when I had zero social awareness and could laugh SO loudly I really can't imagine now, but well, people got to move on! :)
In any case, I do hope that my life goes smooth-sailing from now onwards, and that I will graduate successfully in May! here's to a happier growing stage as i venture into the working world. *Presents beer*

XOXO ; 11:50 PM


I've been reading posts by thought collective, or is it Elite Daily, recently and I cant help but nod my head away as I scroll through the posts.
Things like, travelling will make you feel that actually you aren't really needed when you realised how everything and everyone are still functioning as usual, just without you. I mean yah i know that the world will still continue moving and rotating and me being away doesn't change that fact. However it's the dampening feeling when you realised how much things have changed in your family's and close friends' lives that you just aren't there anymore.
I don't know if i'm feeling this just because i'm homesick, but actually i don't think so, on second thoughts.
I think it's just that i have more time to think about such issues, and read more traveling posts, to agree with what they wrote cause they resonate with me.
and to be honest i'm really grateful for this chance to go for an exchange, where i get to experience life on another scale. You never know how different things are when you truly get to experience them yourself huh?
I am beginning to understand why some people are dying to get out of Singapore, to migrate away, to live somewhere else. I don't know if i am feeling the same way as them, but one thing for sure I wouldn't give the "why?! Singapore is such a great country to live in with low crime rates and blah" because I understand.
Even with the advantages of living in Singapore, I know the feeling when one just wants to get out and explore, to see the world; to lead a different lifestyle.

XOXO ; 2:46 AM

USA/CANADA TRIP 11 aug - 26 aug 

 Flagstaff day 1 

Explored the area around where we live, Grand Canyon International Hostel, and settled down at a korean restaurant for dinner. didn't have much time to walk around bc of flight delays and what not, resulting in us only reaching flagstaff about 5pm 😕 

 Flagstaff day 2 

 Set off for the Grand Canyon tour where we got our groceries and then stopped at Grand Canyon for some photo taking! 
The Grand Canyon was so majestic I took countless of photos but not one can really portray how amazing it was. Guess seeing is believing, and the image of the Grand Canyon will stay in my mind for a long time :)
Met some nice people during the tour as well - Rosy from London, Ashleigh from South Africa, and Kristy from Austria. 
The tour also included a hike down the south rim of the Grand Canyon and the route down was so slippery!!!!! but when we reached this OOH AHH point, the view was simply to die for and I never regretted hiking that path for that view. Next we proceeded upwards back to our van and we set off to see more gorgeous views at different sides of the canyon. Ended the day with a dinner together with the girls, I ordered a grilled chicken breast sandwich and wanted to stay on to chitchat with them but my cough and throat didn't permit me to :( Went back earlier with Joey and rested for the day!

 Los Angeles Day 1 

Woke up early in the morning to catch the flights to LA!! and only reached LA/ settled down in our hostel - USA hostels Hollywood, about 5pm at night. The hostel was great and pretty, and situated right smack in Hollywood :D So we only managed to explore Hollywood for the day and we had Japanese food for dinner(:  

 Los Angeles Day 2

 
Met up with Isaac for the Universal Studios Hollywood!!!! The rides were interesting, not so much of thrilling except for maybe the Jurassic Park waterfall and the revenge of the mummy! Love how the mummy ride has a long stretch of backwards fall tho not that steep  Played from about 10am till 10pm at night!!!! hahahaha Transformers and Shrek were the same as the ones in Singapore :) Despicable me and The Simpsons rides were new and cute!! hmm and the whole place was much bigger compared to Singapore, and has the upper lot and lower lot. But imo I think that Singapore's one is pretty good too bc the difference in rides/ size ain't that big! + Singapore has thrilling Battlestar rides(: 

 Los Angeles Day 3 

Last day in LA and we decided to visit the Venice Beach and Santa Monica Beach  Venice Beach was nicer because it was less packed with people(: The sand, sun and sea were so gorgeous I haven't seen such beauty in a long time. It was just so amazing and Singapore has none of these - Sentosa just can't compare with the beaches in LA. Walked from Venice beach to Santa Monica Beach, and saw the famous Santa Monica Pier and the Santa Monica Ferris Wheel:) 
Met Shuyinn at the SM promenade 3rd street for some nice Mexican food - Chipotle! and we went to walk /shop around the area before she drove us back to Hollywood:) Cutesy shuyinn is forever so kind, she texted me after she saw the photos of the Universal Studios and wanted to meet up, then made the effort to plant herself in our plans of visiting the beaches and offered to send us back after that so that we can save some money :")

 

San Francisco day 1 

Reached here via greyhound at 7am in the morning. man was it cold?!!!! 
The wind was practically blowing continuously in 14degrees with no sun at all. and I was wearing a sleeveless dress HAHA too much win. 
Proceeded to our airbnb house when Joey and I lost each other during a bus ride when I couldn't alight in time before the bus moved off  
We rested in the house for awhile, then set out for Union Square and Chinatown! :) Met Zetong for dinner at a Mediterranean restaurant and caught up for quite awhile!! so extra happy to meet your friends when you're somewhere so far from Singapore(: 

 San Francisco day 2

Today we woke up at 1130am, couldn't even hear the alarm I think I slept too well :p We then proceeded to a bike shop near fisherman wharf to rent a bike!!!! Cycled across the Golden Gate Bridge and then to Saulitimo which is a small cosy town with restaurants and cafés and souvenir shops. Walked around and had our tea/lunch at that place before we ferried back to the bike shop to return our bikes!! The whole cycling process was tiring at the upslope bits but extremely thrilling at the downslope parts. I think most people will press a little of the brakes when going downslope cause it's just so steep, but I didn't and went extra fast :p Walked around the Girahemmi square and then proceeded back to our apartment to rest for the next day! 

 San Francisco Day 3 

Today we woke up at about 9 ish in the morning to do our laundry. There is this huge German Shepard (I think) in the place where they placed their washing machines and dryers there. ohgosh:( 
Today's itinerary include checking out the fisherman wharf (plus lunch there too!) and the golden gate park :D 

 San Francisco Day 4

 
Last night in our apartment and so we checked out at 1030am!!! Went on to look at the twin peaks just to realise that I've been climbing it all along HAHAHAH thought that I would be able to see it or something! :p After twin peaks we went to the University of California, Berkeley and explored the campus there(: it's much sunnier and the atmosphere there is lively!!!! Bought a Berkeley tanktop and a Berkeley baby shirt for baby jane :D really loving all the small baby clothes that I see in US!!! hahaha all so cute and lovely(: We went to the downtown - Westfield for dinner since we didn't have much plans and have time to spare. At about 8+ we went back to our apartment to collect our luggage and got the owner's brother to help us call a cab! :p Off we go to SFO San Francisco Airport to ton overnight for our flight at 630am the next morning. Goshhhz super tiring hahaha. 

 Vancouver Day 1 

Reached at about slightly more than 9am which was longer than it's supposed to be, guess it didn't really matter because I was knocked out the whole time :p Aircanada was so comfortable!! or maybe I was too tired! HAHA so the owner of the airbnb apartment came to fetch us over to her place for a fee of 25CAD, which was not too bad! She had to wait for us for about 1 hour which I felt really sorry about :/ Proceeded to Granville Island which had many markets, stores and shops inside and it was buzzing with people! bought some raspberries and blueberries for a total of 6+CAD HAHA WHAT WHY SO CHEAP  We also ate at the Granville Island Public Market and I ordered a seafood noodle soup!! guess I really miss Chinese food too much huh! >:) Aquabused to Yaletown where we explored the area too. This is supposed to have lots of shops but all that I saw were that expensive and atas service places like hair cutting, manicure, pedicure shops. Meh. So we had some beer /drinks at Cactus before we left to go to our apartment again!^^ nua until about 7pm then we headed out to get some jap dinner(:

 

Vancouver Day 2

 
So we woke up at 10am today HAHHAHA so much for setting my alarm at 830am :p did some final research and set off at 1130am, first stop - Lynn Valley Park! After walking + hiking through the park, seeing many people cliff jumping, we went off to Stanley Park and cycled around the place (: Only used an hour to cycle the whole area around the seabed!! The view was so beautiful  had some korean food near the bike rental shop for dinner and now we are heading to the Star observatory for some star gazing! hehe (didn't manage to go to the observatory in the end bc the buses were taking too long to come )

 Vancouver Day 3

 
Met Michael and his wife at Main Street/science world station's Starbucks which was already tore down HAHA luckily we still manage to find each other!!! He was carrying a Singapore flag which made it easy for us to recognize him HAHA. we then took a false creek ferry across to this atas looking restaurant /bar for lunch!(: Ordered a smoked salmon thin crust pizza, some tacos and a beetroot salad which made us all so full!!!! total cost was 88Cad which after the tips came to a hundred cad! Michael offered to treat for the meal :) After that they drove us to Windsor Stables to look at horses!!!! hahahah his wife is a horse rider and we played with Scarlett for awhile(: It is a white horse which is really cute! Michael and wife then fetched us to UBC bc I wanted to take a look at that campus. hehe explored around the campus and it was not as nice as Berkeley IMO? hahaha we then took a bus, and skytrain to Bridgesport for the Richmond Night Mkt! before that we reached kinda too early, so we walked around and found this giant super mart which sells things at really cheap prices (more Asians there than Caucasians!) and I bought a pack of salmon sashimi for 9.40cad :p Richmond's food were quite expensive, like 7cad for afew sticks of stewers etc etc. haha didn't thought that the food was worth that price so I only ate 2 prawn hargao dimsum, shared a cinnamon roll which supposedly originated from Hungary, and 7 tiny curry fishballs. Spent about 10cad in total for these!!! Nonetheless the food made me happy bc I miss all these spicy/Chinesey food hahaha  

 Vancouver Day 4

 
Today we went to walk around in Commercial Drive and the downtown in Vancouver(: did some shopping and bought a GAP pullover, an American Eagles Outfitter Jeans and hmmm.... think that's about it :p today is a pretty relaxing day where we walked, shopped, and stopped for food as and when we feel hungry. Got some hotdog for dinner and it wasn't filling enough such that we had to get some other food when we reach the airport at 7+pm for our flight to Edmonton (to realise that it was delayed to 1020pm when we reached :( ) 

XOXO ; 12:09 PM


hmmmmmm feeling realllllyyyyy bored right now so i'm here to blog.


XOXO ; 4:02 PM


In the past I used to be able to get past each academic level with just pure luck and a little bit of wit here and there to compensate for my laziness and complacency.
Now I cant even forsee myself doing so anymore because in Uni everyone is just toooooo smart and tooooo hardworking.
Sigh, how to compete with them given my mediocrity and extreme complacency??????
There are just too many a times when I have the thought of just-staying-mediocre, but this voice at the back of my head tells me that I can do better!!!
And that I shouldn't settle, so yea here I am at 1am STILL doing my revision for tomorrow's paper.
Must not disappoint people who hold high hopes for me as well, so there!
haha wish me luck! ^^

XOXO ; 1:02 AM


aiyozz dont know what's with my random mood swings lately... urgh irritating the hell out of me >:/

Anyway it's after mid terms now, (Week 8 to be more precise) and there's just 5 more weeks to the end of this semester!
omgoodness time is passing wayyyy too fast!
can't imagine that i'm about to start working in like 1.5/2.5 years O:
hahaha alright, finally picked myself up aft 3 hours of lazing in bed to do my econs-history essay which is due next tuesday! :/
And i think i will be getting most/all my mid terms paper back next week!
hmmmmm.. dont know what to feel about it /:
OK BYE HAHA

XOXO ; 4:55 PM




XOXO ; 12:35 AM

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